she is her,her is me.

She sits in Indian style
her hair braided to the side..
bangs that fall perfectly over her raised brow.
a paint brush lost in knots behind her ear.
sunkissed cheeks, and a few freckles lay upon her nose.
the wind whispers secrets to her
she keeps them locked away
in the place no one will ever know
her mind wanders in circles
weighed down by the ancors
tied to the boat of her dreams
that slowly sails far from shore..
but today she will paint the ocean.

her feet sink in sand, hot sand.
her legs strong, her head low.
accepting the gifts the ocean leaves her
another wave, a different shell.
bubbles chase the tide around her toes
sun still beating against her back
like the heart in her chest
as she imagines herself,happy.
today she will be happy.

bright lights,loud music and chatter.
she feels free walking the restless streets,
but if only her body could keep up with her feet.
heels high, her mind is quite, but her heart has much to say.
tall building surround her with opportunities,
a pocket full of change, not one familiar face.
red lips, dark eyes lost somewhere so alive at night
and catches her reflection in a glass window..
tonight she is beautiful.

they point, they question her ability to fly
"she doesnt want flight."
"she must be scared of hieghts"
but what if she knows how to climb..
flying would only be a flap of the wings
but a challenge has always aroused her
nothing easy is fun, but pain is worth something
feeling is worth her worry, and her sombers through her dreams
held back by something little seems way to easy..
shes holding back because she's not yet ready
one step up and a thousand more to take
she'll be great
today she will escape.


potential, only is written across her face.
but still she has her secret locked away in some place..
a place no one knows, or cares to find
this place is her, is sacred, is mine.

no worries..

They're "concerned."

They're clearly, worried about my future,right?

I mean thats what they all say.

Apparently im "wasting" my potential

&it saddens them to see such talent in someone who doesn't use it.

Do i not deserve it?

Why am i not in school?

 Why can't i stay somewhere for longer than a month?

Why am i so unhappy?

why am i not using my "potential to my advantage?

How can i possibly use ANYTHING to my advantage when im not satisfied?

Would i actually be advancing with anything if i were to be an artist?

how about singing? let me sing to you..

"THIS IS MY LIFE, let me live it."

yeah i should probably stick to my day job..

wait day job? what is that?

because i'm only familiar with a grave shift..

for something i'm not sure i even want.

They all want it..

They tell me to keep going..

GO WHERE?

i am content RIGHT HERE..

i like to write, let me write for the rest of my life..

take the magic from my escape, 

crowd my paradise with compliments and unfriendly critics

I'll paint, thats it, ill just paint.

Put this color here, a color i cant erase..

but when im done this masterpeice, 

what will it really matter?

a couple dollars in my pocket

while someone else enjoys the view of my canvas on their wall?

no thankyou.

I will be want i want to be,

when i want to be..

let me find me.

it may take a while

but when i find her

i'll be sure to introduce you.